Monthly Archives: April 2007

If you Google “Zionist conspiracy” you get 757,000 hits.

Zionists are, as far as I can tell, the world’s champion conspirers. Zionism (in case you didn’t know) is/was the movement to establish a Jewish homeland in Israel – something which has long been a fact – except that some Zionists geographically define Israel to include land outside Israel’s recognized borders, as defined in the Bible. Zion itself is actually a name for Jerusalem, so a Zionist is a Jerusalemist – if you like. And it is no secret that some Zionists do conspire to control all the land that, according to scripture, God gave to them.

That having been said, there is usually an attempt to suggest Zionist involvement in just about any real or imagined conspiracy that makes its way onto the Internet. Picking a few conspiracy-magnetic events, as examples, Zionists were involved, according to one web site or another, in the 9/11 attack, the “assassination” of Princess Diana and even the assassination of JFK. To give credibility to such theories demands that one’s natural skepticism be, not just suspended, but lynched. Happily, it doesn’t diminish the entertainment value that such conspiracy theories can offer.

Take 9/11. Zionists organized 9/11 to, er, pull the USA (and UK) into direct military involvement in the Middle East (possible, I guess) using a group of Saudis and other Arab nationals, all of whom happened to be graduates of the Osama Bin Laden school of terrorism, and associates of its headmaster. Aside from the sheer unlikeliness of this, the only “evidence” cited for this scenario is the accusation that thousands of Jews were warned not to turn up for work in the Twin Towers on 9/11. As it happens the number of Jewish victims killed on 9/11 was somewhere in the region of 400-500, including 5 Israeli nationals – numbers which square reasonably well with statistical expectations. The putative warnings clearly went unheeded.

The facts are terribly unkind to that theory, offering no support, and they are equally unfriendly to the Princess Diana conspiracy (the Zionist involvement clearly stemming from the fact that dead boyfriend Dodi was an Arab and not from anything as persuasive as evidence). Actually, there’s little point in looking for the Zionist links here, when the assassination idea itself doesn’t stack up.

However, the Zionist involvement in JFK’s assassination should, IMHO, be looked at in a different light. As far as I can gather, the FBI, CIA, Mafia, Cuban exiles, Cuban communists, Right-Wing Republicans, Southern Democrats led by Lyndon Johnson, Military Industrial complex, Illuminati, Bilderberg Group and, just possibly, aliens, were all involved in JFK’s assassination. (Lee Harvey Oswald may have been involved too). It must be the case that a conspiracy involving every other real or imagined plotter on the planet also included Zionists.

That notwithstanding, it is worth pointing out that the Book of Revelations has done a great deal to provoke restless minds into associating Israel, and hence Zionism, with the “End of Times”, the Rapture, apocalyptic horsemen and the rest, by referring to the location of the “last battle” as being at Armageddon – a real place in Israel, and quite disappointingly, an unexceptional hill. As a fair number of people seem to believe that the “End of Times” is just about now, give or take a decade or two, the temptation to associate Zionists with just about anything major that happens is rather strong – on the assumption that Zionist-provoked global events are milestones on the road to Armageddon.

This at least, is a preferable situation than the one that used to prevail, when inferred and imaginary Zionist plots were used as an excuse to persecute the Jews.